I made a mistake, I need her in my life

I was with the love of my life 4 years straight, then 3 years separated. During these past 3 years, she has been in other relationships, I haven’t moved on, because I know I was meant to be with her. So the past 2 months, we started hanging out, and spending more time together. Nothing official, she is not ready for anything serious at this time. So this past Sunday, Im at church asking for forgiveness on the very embarrassing, demeaning texts I’ve sent thru my cel and on FB. Monday morning, she saw these things on my cel, and Ive lost every ounce of respect, humility, dignity, and love she ever had for me. Ive repented hard and long, Im still repenting, Im changing my life and choices. How do I gain her respect back, and convince her that it didn’t mean anything to me, never has and never will, that all I need is her to take a chance on me, and move forward. I feel like all the good things, the waiting around, the unconditional love I have for her means nothing if I make a mistake. I need her back in my life, and need her to see me and how serious I am about making this change in my life. Need your advice…